I am prepared to stay in this marriage at all costs_New Vision Newspaper_7 April 2015

NAME OF THE ARTICLE:  I’m prepared to stay in this marriage at all costs

NAME OF THE PUBLICATION: New Vision Newspaper

DATE: 7 April 2015

COUNTRY:  Zambia

This is a story of a woman who vows that she is not ready to stay on in the marriage despite being subjected to gender based violence (GBV).

The headline in itself tells a million story to the world about the desperation of the woman who vows not to go anywhere despite being subjected to Gender Based Violence (GBV) and knowing she is living with a man who does not love her.

It encourages the cultural believe that women are not supposed to go out marriage no matter what they go through. In Zambia, during marriage lessons, women who are about to go into marriage are taught to be strong in marriage no matter what they go through. They say, for a woman to walk out of marriage because of the beating which she is subjected her husband is a sign of weakness and failure.

Because of such believes women are scared to come out of abuse marriages to avoid embarrassment talk from the society. Furthermore, there is a belief that when your husband beats you it is a sign of love so women will want to stay in abusive marriage because it is love to them.

It is the reason why this woman when her husband whom she knows very well that he tells her is a womanizer that he has impregnated another woman, she does not react. However, being human, in as much as she wants to be strong by not reacting, she secretly cry.

The story goes to the extent of identifying the woman as Grace Phiri and refers to her as a grade nine drop out. The article brings out the economic dependence of women on men who know very well that even if they abusive to their wives, they will not leave their marriages because they economically depend on them.

The story sends a message that most women who are not educated depend on their husbands for survivals the reason why they vow not to leave their marriages amidst abusive. The message that they are sending is that women can stick to an abusive marriage because they have no one to depend on apart from their husbands.

I feel the story in itself perpetuates GBV in that it encourages women to stay in abusive marriages. The story also expresses the woman’s fears of not wanting to have a child out of wedlock because one becomes a laughing stock by society.

There was a need for the reporter to give hope to abused women by talking to women movement such as the Young Women Christian Association who could offer solutions to women in such abusive marriage so that they know that there is life beyond abusive marriages.

Further, women in such relationships should be encouraged to speak out about what they go through as a process of healing.  They could be encouraged to write or share their experiences with other women.