Back in my house

Date: December 2, 2009
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Last year I told my story about how a man in my community had harassed me, until one day he finally beat me so badly I had to go to the hospital, just because I am disabled. This day was a terrible day for me, it even left me with scars. Even worse, for four years after that day, I did not go back to that place. I even left my house there, and went to live with my mother. I did not want to see him or face him.

At the Gender Links workshop, I met lots of women who had also been abused. Meeting with these made a big change in my life. Meeting with different people who speak different languages really motivated me.

I asked myself, why am I doing this person who hurt me a favour by leaving my own house. I said to myself, let me prove to myself that I’m a human being, my life is mine. No matter what he can do or say , to hell with him – this house belongs to me.

I went back to my house that I had left for so long. Since September last year until now I do as I please, so he can see that I do not care about him and I am not scared of him.

The man who abused me sent a neighbour to come and ask for forgiveness and I asked the neighbour “What forgiveness? Why can’t he come straight to me like he did last time when he came and hit me, insulted me saying I am a cripple?” I told her that he should face me himself.

I told the neighbor to go and tell him that I am fine. I do not care about him and I am moving forward with my life and I am proud of myself.

I thank Gender links for these meeting they do. It was great that I meet people who know how to comfort other people and share ideas. It encouraged me to forget many bad things I meet in life. You receive good results no matter how hard it is at first to talk about how people have hurt you. It is better than pretending as if everything is okay.

This story is part of the “I” Stories series produced by the Gender Links Opinion and Commentary Service for the Sixteen Days of Activism on Gender Violence.


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