Lesotho: It is over!

Lesotho: It is over!


Date: November 26, 2014
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Since I was a little girl I have always had a difficult life because it was really difficult for me to go to school, to pay my school fees and have a proper uniform like other kids, but the situation never stopped me from continuing my journey. I am a Mosotho woman aged 24 and I have two kids from different fathers. I live with both my parents and neither of them is working. When I was doing my form A at the age of 16 I fell pregnant with my first child and I was expelled from school when my teachers realised that I was pregnant. My boyfriend was a taxi driver and he was not ready to be a father and neither was I ready to be a mother at the age of 16. I was very angry when I was told to leave school when I was doing Form A at the age of 16. I did not know how I was going tell my parents. They had been working very hard to ensure that I was able to attend school and then I disappointed them in that way. I just could not stop crying.

I spent two weeks trying to figure out how I was going to break the news to my parents. My boyfriend was trying to calm me down, but he made it clear that he was not ready to be a father, and he could not afford to be a father. He was not ready emotionally or financially. He even suggested that I go for an abortion, but I did not know what I wanted, I was confused. I did not listen to him; I was not in the position to make any kind of decision. I was young and stupid. I finally decided to go home after the two weeks and when I got home my parents were very happy that I was visiting after so many weeks. I used to go home every Friday and they had been calling and asking when I would come home, but I was not ready, I did not know what to say to them. We were very happy to meet, but I did not tell them as I did not know where to start. On the Saturday morning my aunt visited us and she found me bathing and I think that is when she saw me.

I was exactly five months and basically I was showing. I told my mother and she could not believe it, she was crying and asked me to tell her that it was not true. I cried and I told her that I wished that it was not true, but it was true, I was pregnant and I had been expelled from school. When she heard about the father she was even more disappointed. My aunt tried to calm her down and showed her that mistakes do happen, but the challenge was how she was going to tell my father. My aunt decided to stay so that she could be there when my mother told my father. My father was very strict, but he was a good father and luckily he was not as angry as I had expected. Both my parents were really supportive and they promised me that they would look after the baby so that I could go back to school. The baby arrived and and the next year I was supposed to go back to school. Things were really tough for me, it was difficult for my parents to pay my school fees and there was the baby as well. I started to date older men so that they could give me money. I was able to pay for my school fees and buy groceries for me and for my family. When they asked where I was getting the money I lied that I was doing people’s hair. They believed me and realised that I was more responsible after having a baby. My life changed, I had everything that I needed, and those men would do anything for me and my life. My marks dropped because I was not concentrating much on my school work. When I wanted to read and do school work they would call me and I would leave everything, they did not want me to do school work, they just wanted to have fun.

After some months of having a nice time, I realised that I was pregnant again. My goodness, I just could not believe it, my parents were so disappointed in me. They did not know what to do about me and I was also disappointed, I did not wait to be expelled from school, I just decided to quit. I started to work as a sex worker in town. It was tough because our clients would not pay us after work or would refuse to use protection. My parents were not aware of what I was doing. I told them I had found a job and my shifts were at night. The police would beat us and kick us, it was really difficult. One day I just decided that I wanted my life back and now I do laundry for people. It is not a nice job for a girl of my age, but it is a decent job because I am now able to put food on the table for my family.

*Not her real name

This story is part of the “I” Stories series produced by the Gender Links News Service encouraging the view that speaking out can set you free.

I live with both my parents and neither of them is working. When I was doing my form A at the age of 16 I fell pregnant with my first child and I was expelled from school when my teachers realised that I was pregnant. My boyfriend was a taxi driver and he was not ready to be a father and neither was I ready to be a mother at the age of 16. I was very angry when I was told to leave school when I was doing Form A at the age of 16. I did not know how I was going tell my parents. They had been working very hard to ensure that I was able to attend school and then I disappointed them in that way. I just could not stop crying.

 

 

I spent two weeks trying to figure out how I was going to break the news to my parents. My boyfriend was trying to calm me down, but he made it clear that he was not ready to be a father, and he could not afford to be a father. He was not ready emotionally or financially. He even suggested that I go for an abortion, but I did not know what I wanted, I was confused. I did not listen to him; I was not in the position to make any kind of decision. I was young and stupid. I finally decided to go home after the two weeks and when I got home my parents were very happy that I was visiting after so many weeks. I used to go home every Friday and they had been calling and asking when I would come home, but I was not ready, I did not know what to say to them. We were very happy to meet, but I did not tell them as I did not know where to start. On the Saturday morning my aunt visited us and she found me bathing and I think that is when she saw me.

I was exactly five months and basically I was showing. I told my mother and she could not believe it, she was crying and asked me to tell her that it was not true. I cried and I told her that I wished that it was not true, but it was true, I was pregnant and I had been expelled from school. When she heard about the father she was even more disappointed. My aunt tried to calm her down and showed her that mistakes do happen, but the challenge was how she was going to tell my father. My aunt decided to stay so that she could be there when my mother told my father. My father was very strict, but he was a good father and luckily he was not as angry as I had expected. Both my parents were really supportive and they promised me that they would look after the baby so that I could go back to school. The baby arrived and and the next year I was supposed to go back to school. Things were really tough for me, it was difficult for my parents to pay my school fees and there was the baby as well. I started to date older men so that they could give me money. I was able to pay for my school fees and buy groceries for me and for my family. When they asked where I was getting the money I lied that I was doing people’s hair. They believed me and realised that I was more responsible after having a baby. My life changed, I had everything that I needed, and those men would do anything for me and my life. My marks dropped because I was not concentrating much on my school work. When I wanted to read and do school work they would call me and I would leave everything, they did not want me to do school work, they just wanted to have fun.

After some months of having a nice time, I realised that I was pregnant again. My goodness, I just could not believe it, my parents were so disappointed in me. They did not know what to do about me and I was also disappointed, I did not wait to be expelled from school, I just decided to quit. I started to work as a sex worker in town. It was tough because our clients would not pay us after work or would refuse to use protection. My parents were not aware of what I was doing. I told them I had found a job and my shifts were at night. The police would beat us and kick us, it was really difficult. One day I just decided that I wanted my life back and now I do laundry for people. It is not a nice job for a girl of my age, but it is a decent job because I am now able to put food on the table for my family.

*Not her real name

This story is part of the “I” Stories series produced by the Gender Links News Service encouraging the view that speaking out can set you free.

 


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