South Africa: Anna Mgcobo

My name is Anna Mgcobo. I was born 1974/04/11. I grew up in Soweto, Meadowlands Zone 1, with 2 other sisters and both my parents. While staying at Medowlands around the age of 13, I was raped for the first time. I told my mother, and she told my neighbour by the name of Ausi Seiso, and she advised my mother to look of this generation, and my mom just gave me Haarlemers medication; she didn’t tell my father, and the whole thing is still a secret even today.

After about 2 years, we moved to Chiawelo ext. 2, still in Soweto, because the house we were staying in was too small. We moved to my grandmother’s house. It was a big family with all the uncles, aunts, and other cousins. My uncle’s friend would come to our house; at that time, there was no electricity; we still used candles. My uncle’s friend would carry me to sit on his lap in the dark, and he would molest me (put fingers inside me) while everyone could not see until he was wet. I never told anyone about this because I felt no one would believe me as everyone was there. This happened almost every day when he would come.

While in secondary, close by our home, I was almost raped again by my cousin’s other cousin. I was able to fight him; at that time, I was around 17 years old; still, I never told anyone.

While in standard 8, I met a boyfriend at school, my first boyfriend. He used to rape me, as I told him I was not ready, but he would come even when I ran away from him; he would beat me till he raped me. I never told anyone still.

All that I went through was painful, but the most painful thing is that I couldn’t talk to anyone about what I went through or how I’m feeling.

But I recently (3 years ago) told my cousin because of the relationship we have built, and it turned out that she has also been through the same thing (with the uncle in her home). She also has not told anyone except for me because I opened up to her. Life is very tough sometimes. The whole situation made me to feel valueless unworthy in life. I trust in God that one day I will be free and have someone to talk to. By writing this story I m so emotional but it is helping me lot.

I knit to keep busy and also make a bit of money as I do not work. But my dream is to start my business of selling kiddie clothes and home cleaning detergents.