Zimbabwe: My miscarriages may cost me my marriage

Date: October 10, 2019
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I was born to a very loving and caring father, Davison, who made me what I am today. My mother died when I was only three and left Davison to take care of the family. I grew up doing everything with my brother, Malvin. My father did not remarry for he later told us that he did not believe that another woman would give us appropriate care. My father would hire some elderly house maids to do all the house chores whilst we attended school. However, Davison encouraged us to do some of the house chores because he added that the maids would not always going to be there to assist us.  

After completing grade seven, Davison stopped hiring the house maids. He insisted that Malvin and I were old enough to cook, wash our clothes and clean the house for ourselves. I was angry with his decision that time but I am now grateful because that helped in moulding me and shaping my future. I currently do not encounter any challenges in doing any household chores. I do not even need a house maid because no house-task is daunting to me.  

I got married in 2018 and have found that my father trained me well. The only challenge I currently face is that of my mother-in-law. I had had two miscarriages in a space of one year. I first got pregnant before I got married and had to elope to my husband’s place. A few months later I had severe stomach and back pains which resulted in the first miscarriage. I was really heart-broken. My husband stood with me throughout that ordeal. Malvin encouraged me to do something with my good education so that I could positively look ahead for something else. I did some driving lessons and finally obtained a driver’s licence. I started attending lessons for a diploma in secretarial studies. I then fell pregnant again.  

During the third month of the pregnancy, I experienced the same fate once more. My husband took me to hospital after some bleeding only to be told that I had lost my baby again. My mother in law then started spreading rumours that I was deliberately doing some abortions because I did not want to be a mother. My husband was the one who broke the sad news to me and he assured me that he would listen to such utterances. He promised me that we just had to stick to each other and pray for the Almighty’s intervention.