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By Mauwane Raophala
I was about to turn 5 years old when I lost my beloved father. I would like to put it out there that it has been hard for me to grow up without a father figure. However, my late mother played his role to such extent that I felt like I still have a father right by my side.
It was on the 5th of September 1998 when my father passed away. I still recall that day vividly when my mother, my siblings, and I went to see him at the hospital. Unfortunately, children were not allowed to enter the patientsā ward at the hospital, because they are at the risk of contracting infections, therefore I was left outside with my mother. Few minutes later of waiting outside, my siblings came out crying and I could not understand what was happening. Even though my childish mind just concluded that when people get into the hospital ward that means they should come out crying. Little did I know that I just lost my father. One may ask how do I remember all of these things yet I was still a child by then. Well I believe that by the power of God, I still have the memories of what transpired that particular day.
Every year on fatherās day, my heart shatters the moment I realise that I have no father to celebrate this prestigious day with. Nevertheless, I told myself that I am not all alone, but I am with him spiritually. Even though he is no longer of this world, he will continue to be a tender smile to guide my way, the sunshine to light up my day. Deep in my heart he will always stay.
Not a single day goes by without thinking about him, and longing for his presence in life. It is a struggle to get through each day without him, and it is painful accepting that this struggle will never end. When I lost my mother back in 2016, I was told that time heals but some wounds never end. This awaken some of archaic memories of my fatherās death.
I believe that the day he had to leave me, his life on Earth was through and God had plans for him. Whenever I feel like the world has turned against me, I just whisper his name in my heart, and he will be there for me because I believe that he lives within me. That is how close we were when I was young. I cherish the little time I spent with him, and I am sure that he is so proud of the respectable young man I have become today wherever he is.
I promise to put his surname on the map in the near future in order to make him proud. I will continue celebrating his life each day by doing better in life. Alutha continua (struggle continues) for prosperous journey I am willing to take in my life to keep his legacy on.
Photo: Courtesy of Nog geen Vaderdagcadeau? Lees dit!
Mauwane Raophala is a Media intern at Gender Links. This article is part of the GL News and Blogs series.
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