A tribute to Emmanuel Kasongo: my colleague, my friend, my brother

It is said that writing can be cathartic. As I sit at my computer tapping at the keyboard, I write to ease the immeasurable loss I feel at the tragic passing of Dr Emmanuel Kasongo in a car accident while travelling to Mansa in Luapula Province of Zambia on 4 November 2005.

 

Kasongo, from Zambia, was the Deputy Chairperson of the Gender and Media Southern Africa (GEMSA) Network and also the Director of the Zambia Institute of Mass Communication (ZAMCOM). But he was also a husband, a father, a teacher, a colleague and a friend to many. 

 

Many who will read this tribute would never have heard of Emmanuel Kasongo, or have had the privilege of knowing this inspiring and philanthropic man. For those who knew him, our loss and grief is deep.

 

Emmanuel had a Doctorate and I did not; he held a superior position to mine in our regional GEMSA network. But he was always humble and of sound mind and appreciated the inputs of others in whatever discussion, official or otherwise, that he engaged in.

 

When I first met Emmanuel in 2004 at the first ever Gender and Media Summit in South Africa, which gave birth to GEMSA, he greeted me in perfect Sesotho. He had just heard a presentation I made after being introduced as a participant from Lesotho. He related amazing stories about his short-lived stay in Lesotho. This was the beginning of a precious relationship. From then on, Emmanuel became a mentor to me, then a colleague through GEMSA; this evolved into friendship and then into brotherhood, even though he could have been nearly as old enough to be my father.

 

Emmanuel had been to a seminary as he had wanted to be a priest. But the tides of life saw him change direction into media and gender activism. His deeply rooted philosophical analysis of life always had me mesmerised and lost for words. Emmanuel was more than a charismatic orator, he was not like any other man whom I have rubber shoulders with: Sejana se setle ha se jele, and therefore, finding the right words also seems impossible.

 

I recall the last exchange we had; I can almost hear his voice. Last week we were talking on the telephone, in a dilemma over whether he should come to Lesotho in December with his family or whether we (my family and I) should visit. This was because we felt that our friendship had grown from mere colleague to brother status and as such our families should meet. We agreed that we would duly consult with our better halves about the issue and would resolve it soonest.

 

What we did pledge however was that we would keep even closer contact and communicate regularly by email or by phone when ever such a chance arose. I told him I would be facilitating training on HIV/AIDS and the media the whole week and he said: "Eish bra-Tom, you are really growing in status," and I said: "I was taught by the best, you." We ended by my saying that I would call him during the weekend. We never spoke again.

 

But I know Emmanuel, we will keep closer contact, I will never forget you, and I will always cherish the times we had together, the good and kind words we shared together, and all the times that we spent going to the chapel for our mass wine. One day we shall meet again my brother, my friend.

 

The GEMSA Network, conveyed its deepest condolences to the wife and family of Emmanuel Kasongo. In a letter to his family, GEMSA Chairperson Colleen Lowe Morna said: "It is with the deepest grief that we have learned today of the passing away of our dear brother and colleague, Dr Emmanuel Kasongo.”

 

Dr Kasongo will be sorely missed by all of us, as a strategist, activist and dear friend, whose commitment to ‘making every voice count, and counting that it does’ inspired so many of us in GEMSA.”

 

Goodbye my friend.